Support Group

So I seriously think that there should be support groups for those that are in the adoption process!!  I’m going crazy!  It is so hard to not get discouraged and think that we may not have a family until years down the road – pending a birthmother choosing us to adopt their child.  I’ve been a part of adoptive forums – where other families that are waiting hang out… but sometimes that is not very “supportive.”  Actually, sometimes it almost makes it more discouraging.  There are people on the forums that have been waiting for over two years to adopt a child domestically!  Of course, I don’t know their openness to different situations or what agency they are with, but I really don’t want to wait that long.  I’m praying that we don’t have to wait that long.  Then there are people that are set on putting me in my “place” because I’ve only been waiting for a month… they almost make it seem like we don’t deserve to get a placement yet.  I think I may need to stop visiting the forums.  I wish I had people I knew that are going through domestic adoption right now… people that we could hang out with, pray with and just support each other (and remind each other that it is in God’s timing).  If any of you know anyone else that is going through domestic adoption, let me know.

We have not heard anything as a result of the two birthmothers that were going to be looking at our profile last week.  Tim and I have been really praying for them this past week.  Praying that our profile will stand out among the others that they are looking through.  Praying that the right mom and child will be drawn to us – whether it is one of these or one in the future.


Here are a few questions that people have asked us in the past months – maybe you are wondering too:

Are we adopting a baby or are we open to older children?
Tim and I really want to experience the whole thing – so baby times too.  So, right now, we are requesting an infant.  But, if an instance arises where there is a baby and a 2 year old – we would probably take two kids.

Have we explored adopting from foster care?
We did ask about this, but for the most part adopting from foster care is older child adoption.  We may consider something like this in the future, but for right now we are sticking to domestic infant adoption.  For those of you that don’t know – when you adopt from foster care – the cost is very minimal.  (Usually less than $1000)  Also, you get funding from the state – not a lot, but some.  If you are interested in this – I would check with Bethany.

What kind of openness will we have with the birthmother?
This will depend on what the birthmother wants – we are open to some visits and cards/photos sent.  This will all be determined as we meet our birthmother and set some guidelines.

Are we open to transracial adoption?
Absolutely!  We are open to any child!

Did we request a certain gender?
You can request a gender, but we did not.  We figured if we were having our own children – we wouldn’t be able to choose, so why make that specific now?

Have we considered adopting from Haiti?
Yes – we actually contacted our case worker after the earthquake happened along with many others.  Basically, if you look at my last post you will see that there are not specific plans for more kids leaving Haiti.  The international adoption program looks a lot different than the domestic program.  We would have to fill out lots more paperwork and go through more things in order to be in that program.  Unfortunately, we cannot do both at the same time… so we are sticking with domestic infant adoption.


Those are some of the basic questions that we’ve been asked… if you have more questions let me know – make a comment and I will answer more. Thanks to those that have been following along and praying for Tim and I.  We’ve been so blessed to be surrounded by people that love us and encourage us!

Prayer Requests for Tonight:
• Pray for the birthmothers that have our profile right now.  Pray that God will surround them and help them as they make this tough decision.  Pray that they will have a circle of family or friends around them that will encourage and support them.
• Pray for Tim on Tuesday at 2:00pm.  He has a job interview that seems like it would be a great opportunity.

1 comment on “Support Group

  1. Michele Nolte says:

    We will be Praying for all those birth Mom’s and also for Tim’s interview and the both of you each day!!
    All Our Love Mom and Dad

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